I was one of the lucky ones:  I was on home turf and could sleep in my own bed.  Several of my clients didn't have that luxury, being stranded in various places around the world.  Lives were disrupted, budgets stretched and, often, tempers even more.  The situation gave all of us cause to pause...and to reflect on the glaring fact that despite our preference for being in control of our actions, there are times when it simply isn't possible.

What to do?

Those with a more sanguine disposition will laughingly say "Not much!" and move onto their next point of focus.  However, there are times when even the most laid-back characters will struggle to do so - and that is when the outcome is far more serious or personal in nature.  When faced with stressful or frustrating situations, we know from research that the most effective form of resolution is to engage in what psychologists call "problem-focussed coping".  Here, we stop, examine the problem, the cause and the likely ways of dealing with it.  We select a method of preference and execute...in essence, we control the problem and its resolution.

Volcanoes aren't quite to easy to harness and bring under control; nor is a diagnosis of chronic or terminal illness; nor is a relationship break-down or a number of other challenges that we may encounter on our path through life.  After analysis of the problem, we may find that we have some degree of influence - such as managing pain or encouraging good health - but we cannot actually control and resolve the problem itself.  Here, it is important to use "emotion-focussed coping" skills - and to recognise that when we cannot solve the problem, then we need to manage the emotion associated with how we feel about it.  This way, we conserve our energy resources when it is pointless in expending them and offer a different perspective to our mind, possibly producing options that we hadn't previously considered.

Take the example of the volcano, for the purpose of this discussion.  I'll address some of the other topics later in the year.  Those affected by the volcano could have influenced their position to a degree - by changing travel arrangements perhaps or selecting different accommodation or even by (for one person I know) contacting local acquaintances to help them out.  However, many weren't able even to do this much, either initially or later.  Their preservation of mental and physical energy lay in accepting the situation after analysis and focussing on physical and mental relaxation and distraction as much as possible to minimise the damanging impact of frustration.  Bizarre as it might sound, unforeseen time spent in delay might even produce unexpectedly positive outcomes - planning for changes to life and career; acquiring skills to relax the muscles in each part of the body; reflection and contemplation; initiating work ideas or projects; conversations with family members...all of those activities for which there is rarely time during the usual week.

Few people could rationalise that being stranded away from home with heightening costs and disrupted schedules could be a good thing (although those rescued by the new cruise ship may have a different take!), but the key is in mitigation of frustrating circumstances - to recognise when a situation is outside of our control; to change the emotions we feel about it and hence change the options available to us to make the use of time as productive as possible.